Be A Clown

Be A Clown
music and lyric by Cole Porter

I'll remember forever, when I was but three, Mama, who was clever,
Remarking to me: "If, son, when you're grown up, you want ev'rything nice,
I've got your future sewn up if you take this advice:

Be a clown, be a clown, all the world loves a clown.
Act a fool, play the calf, and you'll always have the last laugh.
Wear the cap and the bells and you'll rate with all the great swells.
If you become a doctor, folks'll face you with dread,
If you become a dentist, they'll be glad when you're dead,
You'll get a bigger hand if you can stand on your head,
Be a clown, be a clown, be a clown.

Be a clown, be a clown, all the world loves a clown.
Be a crazy buffoon and the demoiselle's'll all swoon.
Dress in huge baggy pants and you'll ride the road to romance.
A butcher or a baker, ladies never embrace,
A barber for a beau would be a social disgrace,
They all'll come to call if you can fall on your face,
Be a clown, be a clown, be a clown.

Be a clown, be a clown, all the world loves a clown.
Show 'em tricks, tell 'em jokes and you'll only stop with top folks.
Be a crack jackanapes and they'll imitate you like apes.
Why be a great composer with your rent in arrears,
Why be a major poet and you'll owe it for years,
When crowds'll pay to giggle if you wiggle your ears?
Be a clown, be a clown, be a clown.

Be a clown, be a clown, all the world loves a clown.
If you just make 'em roar watch your mountebank account soar.
Wear a painted moustache and you're sure to make a big splash.
A college education I should never propose.
A bachelor's degree won't even keep you in clo'es but millions you will win id you can spin on your nose.
Be a clown, be a clown, be a clown.

Be a clown, be a clown, all the world loves a clown.
Be a poor silly ass and you'll always travel first-class,
Give 'em quips, give 'em fun, and they'll pay to say you're A-one.
If you become a farmer, you've the weather to buck,
If you become a gambler, you'll be stuck with your luck,
But jack you'll never lack if you can quack like a duck...
Be a clown, be a clown, be a clown...